Think about an object, an activity, or a cultural phenomenon you really don’t like. Now write a post (tongue in cheek or not — your call!) about why it’s the best thing ever.
Here you go again, asking me to be clever-witty. To think outside the box and write in a way I’ve never before written.
(best thing ever /opposite of hates / YA Romance style)
“Twerker?” he said.
“Love it!” I said.
“Do it, then,” he said.
“Bite me,” I said.
“Hollywood?” he said.
“Greatest thing to ever show up in modern society.” I said.
“What’s the last movie you saw at the theater?” he said.
“The Notebook.” I said.
“You like pop music?” he said.
“Sure. It’s all so charming and lyrically pleasing to the ear,” I said.
(I can’t go on. Writing this way is as tedious and dry as it is to read.)
Part II – (me being sarcastic about hates I’m supposed to now love / best-seller style)
A girl who looks like Shania Twain walks up to a guy who is a dead-ringer for (swoon) Ryan Gossling. She’s wracking her brains trying to recall every sex scene she just read in 50-Shades and wants to try a few on this hot guy.
“You’re hot.” “I know.” “Like your pecs.” “Aren’t they awesome?” “I just got a boob job.” “I see that.” “Are you a real cowboy?” “Heck, yeah, ma’am. I drive nascar, too, just got back from Afghanistan, and now I’m rustling up the herds out west.” “That’s sexy. I’m staring at your crotch, but you don’t know that because I’m hiding behind these ultra-cool, white plastic shades.” “I’m ogling your fake boobs, but you don’t know that because of these totally rad, science class goggles I just paid $1,500 for at the mall.” “Let’s have sex, but not until chapter seventeen, because then the readers won’t want to stick this thing out til the end.” “I like the way you think.”
(Okay, so I went there)
Lastly, (more sarcastic hates that turn to adores / book turns move-deal style)
I think I see zombies. This is so cool! They’re everywhere, though, right? Nothing wrong with that. Wait … it’s … a werewolf? No freaking way. What’s he doing here? And, he’s not alone, either. There are tons of them making their way out of the … woods? Zombies, werewolves, the woods, and she’s a city girl born and bred but WHAT ever.
Turning the corner. Oh, look! A vampire! I love me some vampire, don’t you? All ancient, worldly, rich, and … they like to sink their fangs into virgin flesh. Lol, I just said virgin. Safe! Hey, Mr. hot-as, sharp-dressed Vampire man! Take me to your castle somewhere in New England, where there are just so many to go around and occupy, eh? Love the Armani, by the way. You so fly!