Tell us about one thing (or more) that you promised yourself you’d accomplish by the end of the year. How would you feel once you do? What if you don’t?
Back in late October of 2013, I promised myself that 2014 would be the year to get published.
Opting out of Blogger this time and choosing WordPress instead, to blog about the experience. It isn’t entirely new to me, just more complex and therefore intimidating (frustrating, really) – but I knew if I was going to succeed (or fail) that I had to find somewhere with a large audience of like-minded people.
Then I chose one of a few stories in my Personal Writing folder and began to seriously reworked it, submitting a bit of it for critique as well. This was, perhaps, the most terrifying deal-breaker of them all, but I did it. GOAL in and of itself, I believe.
Letting someone I don’t know read my work is a lifetime achievement, a huge goal obtained, and one that I feel beyond excited for having done. I finally managed to let go of that silly self-awareness thing that held me back. I need to stop believing that everyone else is somehow better than, more worthy than, and more ingenious than I am.
Along the way, I learned a few things about point-of-view, voice, and especially about opinion versus helpful fact.
After reading so many articles, advice columns, and self-help suggestions, thinking long and hard about the ‘advice’ given at the critique website, and then reading/re-reading the words aloud a few times, editing some more, and then liking the end result (as much as I am able to like something of this magnitude), I created a Smashwords account and learned how to format the .doc for uploading.
As of May 13, 2014, I am an Indie Author. It wasn’t quite the route I started out wanting to take, and I’m still a bit mortified by what I’ve done, but I’ve done it and am honestly proud of myself.
Another overwhelming feeling of accomplishment, even if it is a double-edge sword for me. Questions abound about this decision, but not about why I did what I did. Even at my age, this is a huge breakthrough and one I’ll never forget.
TWO GOALS accomplished in 2014.
Finally, a goal set for accomplishment in 2014 that I’m worried might fail is to make money. I’ve been out of work since 2009 and can’t take much more of this uncertainty. It’s absolutely frightening to live this way, and I’d like the nightmare to end soon. This is where I feel helpless, hopeless, and useless, with no light at the end of the tunnel and no way of getting out.
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